Eighth

So don't get too excited, but I got my latest scan/test results today with my chemo. This drug is not only slowing the cancer's growth, but slowing growth enough that the tumors and lymph nodes are actually shrinking. My tumor markers are down to almost a quarter of what they were three months ago.

The best we had hoped for was that it would slow growth enough that the spots wouldn't get any bigger - so for the tumors to be smaller and the scans showing the growth intensity was down... just, wow.

I'm having a hard time accepting news this good - all I can seem to focus on is that it means 4+ months more of chemo for me (I've had 5 months of continuous chemo so far this time). The doc thinks my body should tolerate it that long on this schedule, and if the drug is still working but my blood counts are too low, we'll start adjusting the schedule and down time so I can stay on it.

I asked, since the cancer is responding to this drug, if increasing the dosage would do more for me. But my blood counts are getting lower week to week, and he feels that increasing the dosage would do more harm than good - that my counts would plummet fast enough that I would have to miss some treatments, or discontinue treatments earlier. In other words, "it ain't broke at the moment, don't try to fix it".

Cancer still sucks, and chemo still sucks. I'm getting more fatigued week to week, the side effects still suck, and I catch every bug or virus that comes within a half mile of me which sucks. I'm short-tempered and whiny and frustrated at the people closest to me because I know they'll put up with it and it really isn't fair to them, and that sucks.

But it's awful nice to have some evidence that this crap is doing some good and buying me some time down the road. I just hope it's buying me some time down the road on my bike - I've had it out just THREE TIMES so far this year and to ride to work no less, not fun wander rides with my gang. It's really starting to piss me off. By the way, I'm going to start being a bitch out in public more often, so I can reserve some of my nice self for the people who have to spend the most time with me. I know you're overjoyed at the prospect of my bitchiness, seeing as I've been so sedate and cheerful thus far. (*grin*)

It's late, I'm either going to try and get some sleep, or play more video games... ah hell, who am I kidding... Wish me luck, maybe my cow will get her crossbow this morning...

Cheers

Seventh

Just haven't posted in a while, so I thought I'd babble. Things and treatment just keep going. I'm hoping I've been feeling better but I don't trust myself anymore - I'm stubborn and tend to feel however I want to feel. I have a scan in a few weeks so I'll wait to have the hard data before I decide that this chemo might be slowing things down. At least my bronchitis is finally going away.

The Pride Festival is this weekend and I'm getting anxious to get out and see friends I usually only meet up with this time of year. Yes, "that festival" for "those people" - but I promise we don't bite unless you ask nicely first, and it isn't contagious. The parade is Sunday the 8th at 10 AM. The festival is after that (parade is free, festival is $5). The parade is a lot of fun and usually really popular with kids because of all the rainbows and noise and candy and necklaces thrown from the floats and marchers. The festival is a great fair-like atmosphere with the usual mix of food, merchandise, and informational booths. I think they're going to have three stages again this year so you can find entertainment to suit your tastes all day long. There's also been a kid area with crafts, entertainment, etc.. Anyway, I'll be there so let me know if you want to meet up or tag along with me (I'll keep you safe from "those people" I swear lol). Here's the website if you want more info http://utahpridecenter.org/utahpride/

Cheers